374. Homesick

I sit alone
rocking gently
to soothe myself
over a cup of ginger chai
quarantined on this planet out of orbit

My soul is sore
from all the contortions it does
to clear out all the lifetimes I hoard
so that
I may have space on my mental shelf
for foreign seasons and forever falsehoods

I started
dressing everything I eat
with grated ginger and asafoetida
to remember the taste of home

I do this from the day I noticed
that I am forgetting all the places I can no longer be in

I am forgetting them
faster than
I am learning to feel at home where I have to be

And I worry

I worry
that soon
home will just be a moment
stuck in a memory I cannot recall

I worry
so
I sit alone
rocking gently
to soothe myself
over a cup of ginger chai