167. Clouds

Ok ok.. I know it looks like a monsoon marathon. But aren't they rather rather seductive and addictive, these rains?! well.. awright!! I shall get over my obsession with the rains and yes, the word 'rather'!!
----------------------------------------------
No purpose or desire but to tease the senile scorching sun,
this summer, all the sky wore were some wispy lone clouds.

Just some cold color, but neither shape nor substance;
today why do you feel like you are my clueless clone, clouds?

Why do I always invite strangers to show my stories to?
Yet again I am talking of you to uninterested unknown clouds

I lived in a dream where winds were love messengers;
How did I reach this city where each day they bemoan clouds?

Do not taunt my rain-warriors with your dull black umbrellas
Either match my seductive season or go- get your own clouds

Please take away these hideous mirrors that morph monsoons
I show them paper rainbows, they show me woe begone clouds

Some move on with time, Sadiq, while others just melt away
Come, for a change, let us try & put up some stone clouds!

166. Barsaati

ulatke tirchi ambar barse
jogan baithi bheetar tarse

bhog chadhake megh mangaaye
ab to kundi bajaa de baalam
chunariya ke chaanv, bajariya na jaaoo
ik barsaati laa de baalam

chanda bujhake chap chap rakh de edhi chat pe rain
chikne gagan se tap tap tapke tedhe chat pe rain
thaali parose raah main dekhoon
bujhe bujhe chulhe pe nindiya senkoon
luk-chup dheere dheere, laake jhini jhini heere
boondon se bindiyaa sajaa de baalam

saanjh ko angna se uthaake bhagaa gayi phir mui boondein
rain bhar mera dar khatkaake jagaa gayi phir mui boondein
ghat ghat-ke ghataa dar keel se chode
milon har raah ye jheel si odhe
saundhi dagariya pe aundhe se sheeshon me
apni suratiya dikhaa de baalam

165. Barsaati

a. Why is it so difficult to find an umbrella which is pretty yet proper?! I refuse to bow down to convention and get myself a hopelessly boring black umbrella!! Let the skies pour down on me. I care two hoots!! I shall possess only a nice umbrella, if at all!! Will someone find me one?!

luk-chupke badra se bach na sakoongi, khul gayi mujh pe bhed
mujhe ik barsaati laa de baalma, ambar me pad gaya ched

PS: those of you who will go looking for one, be informed - my color for this season is green!!

164. The journey to the other side

They served death with breakfast
today
when sleeping adjectives came to life
to do a charade
again for a while
only to go back into hibernation

And paunches
still rhyme with
haunches

Exclamation!!

The sky comes down in shards
every now and then.
There is always
too much
or too little!

Listen,
all the purple questions
on the table in my drawing room
are colored so,
to keep you from noticing
the brown hypocrite.
Stay amused;
stay entertained.
Just do not look further.

When one can't beat them,
one joins them.
What one can't cure,
one endures.

I know-
plastic flowers
don't smell real;
but well,
they don't wilt either!

163. Aabshar - V

a. Today B and I were having a conversation where 'marathon' became a metaphor and he insisted we 'train' in public. :D :D :D and when I feigned embarassment, he said - "Jisne kii sharam, uske phoote karam". Lolm!!! :D :D

chalo ab ham yeh bhi kaam kar len
tujhe ruswaa mujhe badnaam kar len
darwaazein to rasmein puraane hai
jo bhi karna hai khule aam kar len

Lolm.. Don't give that look!! I won't go through with it! I haven't gotten there yet!! :D :D

162. ek raat ki mehmaan

Last evening, I was sitting at the window listening to saiyyan by kailash kher staring at the rainy outdoors. And it hit me, like it does sometimes!! I have tried defying the cycle; but admit I have failed!! Sometimes I wish I could talk of that 'awfulness' inside when I feel it as easily as I talk of 'awesomeness'; maybe with time!!

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jabse tum gaye ho
mulaqaat hoti rahti hai tumse
shab-o-roz
kahne ko sab badal gaya hai
dekhne ko kuch nahin badla
ham roo ba roo baithe rahte hai
guftagoo sahte rahte hain
kahin kahin pehle se manzar bhi mil jaate hai
aur main raat ke ek-aadh pahar
guzaar leti hoon us puraane mausam me
aur subah naashte ke saath saath

koi note chod jaata hai
mujhe yaad dilaane ke liye
main to bas
ek raat ki mehmaan thi

jabse tum gaye ho
main thak gayi hoon
daakiye ko batate huye ke
tum ab yahaan nahin rahte
jab tum paas the
tab maine apne chaukhat pe
tumhare naam ki muskaan taangi thi
apni daastaan ki numaish karte hue
ab yeh pheeki muskaan mere haathon utarti nahin
aur aate jaate musafir
khat chod jate hai dar pe mere
mubaarak-baat dete hue

ab main inhe kaise bataoon-
tumhari zindagi me
main to bas
ek raat ki mehmaan thi

jabse tum gaye ho
saanjh aake jhaankti hai
haan, maine tumhe tohfe me dene ke liye
baadalon me lipti hui bahut si shaamein mangaayi thi
tumhe barsaatein behad pasand hai, na?!
ab yeh har roz aake poochti hain
"woh hain?"
aur main bas khamosh si barasti rahti hoon
unke sang dareeche pe baithe baithe
aur raat ko
tumhari shaql tahalti rahti hai
aankhon me

subah ko rukne ko kahoon
to kahti hai-
"main to bas
ek raat ki mehmaan thi"

jabse tum gaye ho
tumhari yaadon ke safhe udte nahin
bas seene me pade-pade peele pad rahe hai

tum gaur karte kabhi to
dekhte
maine bhi koshish kii thi
ke tumhare jahaan me apne thode nishaan chod doon
shaam ke benaam rasmon me
roz ke betaab paigaamon me
lafzon ke besabr tohfon me

ab farq to nahin padta
par ek sawaal bedaar sa baitha hai seene me
kya
meri yaadein
kam-z-kam
ek raat ki mehmaan thi?!

161. History

I am listening to "Where do you go to, my lovely?!" and it is all coming back again... The terrifying JBness ... no, no, NO...!! This can't return... can't be happening!!
I am a reformed person now! Or was I deluding myself?!! I just need some sleep; maybe!

----------------------------------------------

What does one do -
when yesterday becomes tomorrow?
when the day suffers while the night sins?
when the ritual becomes a rule?

What does one do
when the snowflakes do not let hexagons go
out of fashion?

What does one do?

What?!
-----------------------------------------------------
I am scared; tell me something nice and interesting, quick!!

160. Aabshaar IV

a. Now this is not written by me. B today sent me this 'coz I was too busy to reply to his messages. He hasn't written them either, I am sure!! But ain't it really sweet?! I love the lines... so decided they deserve a place here! :) :) :) and despite the horrendous horrendous way the day was going, I ended up smiling! Thank you! :)

Hue masroof woh is qadar
qadar hamari na rahi
kahen kis-se haal-e-dil
ab kis-se fariyaad karen

lagta hai unke shahar ka
har shaks begana sa
kahaan jaa-ke ab ham
dil ki basti aabaad karen

hota tha bada shor
pahlu mein jis dil ke
hua khaak jalte jalte
ab kise nashaad kare

kab tak rahen zinda
teri ummeed ke sahare
talaash-e-sukoon me ab
kaun kambakht na jaa mare!!

------------------------------------------------

b. I am tired of waiting... so wrote this today!! if you know what I mean :D

Where are you
while my mondays are blue
and my fridays green;
you know what I mean?

While dark is dusty
and light is murky
while days are musky
and nights are quirky,

where ARE you, cotton clouds...
WHERE are you?!!!

:) :) :) and yeah!! I got a dozen reassuring 'I-am-here-only' replies when I put this up as my status message!! :) Thank you!! Louuvvee you off bigly bigly!!! :) :)
-----------------------------------
yeah... at 8:41 on a friday I am at work.. Don't gimme that sad sorry look! don't gimme that horrified look either! nor the disgusted cringed nose look!!
anybody giving looks... Can you see my finger?!! :D :D :D
ok ok ok... shush ...!! back to work... theekke?!

159. Aabshaar - III

a. I was dying at work, yesterday ... and the act is still in present continuous!! Hey congratulate me, I have adopted a new pseudonym - Sadiq; ain't it nice? I know! I know!! :D :D :D

ek mehfil thi teri, Sadiq, abek mazhaar hai mez pe tere
ye kaisa junoon hai ki daftar me dafn hone chala tu bhi

----------------------------------------------------

b. I was flirting with B(yet another guy) and he was trying to write verses for me... and failed (but aawww!! so cute!! :D :D)

Paanv pada jo aasmaan pe, hawaon pe ab shikan se bane
Kah do – aur koshish na kare, baithe rahe bas roobaroo mere

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c. Yes, my ode to Murphy Mornings where Murphy came around to screw me yet again!!(For those who know not- he is the guy who ensures that everything that can go wrong , does! Yes, I have been trying to dump him for ages - 'coz he was cheating on me. I realised he is screwing the whole world, not me alone!!)
Anyways, about morning today - crowded trains.. sloowww autos... and other slow phenomenon .. yes, talking about Jimbu, the man!!
my ode to the pains in my life!!

duniya, tu bahaane maang khadi
kahin taang adi, lee chalaang badi

phir ret pe pahiye phisalne lagi
ghadiyaan sadiyon si chalne lagi

fursat kabse dukaan me tangi padi
bikti hi nahin, hai mahangi badi

har roz me hai kyun kam waqt- bata
jitna bhi hai, kyun hai kambakht- bata

marammat kar, mue ki, mere maalik
marammat kar mue ki, maula mere

---------------------------------------------------

yes yes, I louuvveee you all!!! :D :D :D

158. Aabshaar - II

a.
teri aahaton ki aad me chehra aata nahin nazar
shaayad mere aaine ki tarajuma sahin nahin

teri sohbat ke sukoon ke badle sood me meri yeh jaan
yun maangna ae mere meherbaan sahin nahin

sadakon pe subah ki shaql surkh si hai aaj bhi
naqsh-o-rasm wahin hai par tajariba wahin nahin

muskurake de diya hamne apni sabz ye zameen
badle me de gaye ho tum khaali aasmaan. sahin nahin

---------------------------------------------------

b.
raah phir wahin chale par kaayde alag se hain
baat phir wahin chale par maayne alag se hain
raat khatm kar doon ab; yeh baat khatm kar doon ab
apne dil ke purzon ki poori zaat khatm kar doon ab

---------------------------------------------------

c.
neend dhoondh-ne chale to phir subah milti hai kyun?
kisi aad me aap hi ki baat har jagah milti hai kyun?
jitne dafaa kii koshishein ke apna dil bujha hi de
phir se dil jalaane ki hame vajah milti hai kyun?

------------------------------------------------------

mediocrity has a new home; and I am not going to evict it anytime soon!!!

157. The Vain and The Cursed

It is difficult to ignore
your porcelain face!
You say you want to live
on my door to ward off love and pain;
but I don't need corals
to adorn my desires.

Did it ever happen
that you spent the evening
at the casino at the end of the street
playing roulette with your emotions
to gamble pieces of yourself away?

Did it ever happen
that you tried hard to choose
the right color for your cushions
only to realise each color has a story
and none can be your favorite ever again?

Did it ever happen
that your secret fears
were on air for the late night comedy
and you tried in vain to disown them?

Did it ever happen
that you returned to your apartment
fleeing from the world
only to find it was too small
for you to fall apart?

Did it ever happen
that you tried to simplify
the equation
only to open a few more brackets?

I have lived in that neighbourhood
forever

But I still don't have a Gorgoneion on my door
nor do I own a mirror shield
my ruby red companions
are still at full mast

Medusa
you can't turn me into stone!!

156. The pleasantly sore evening encounter

I should have been warned
that godzilla could be beautiful
while still being insidious

I should have been warned
that there was no point
pruning my chocolate-brown love nest
just because the tide was low

I should have been warned
that hurricanes change course
at short notice-
sometimes without notice-
and ravage the coast

I should have been warned
that silence is an aphrodisiac
and my heart is an amnesiac

I should have been warned
of neon lamps and mirages
and wet paint and dry ice

I should have been;
but well, I was not!

and so there I was
making a death wish
in a foreign language

Though the beach bon-fire tried hard
to scorch the sea
we died together
with a piece of him in me,
while his moans left rocks
on the virgin shore
which the wild warm waves
couldn't wash away.

Thank god,
I chose to ditch our funeral date
Thank god
he did not wake up for breakfast!!

155. Aabshaar-I

This is when I collate all my thoughts about all the inconsequential things over a week or so; and present it all at a time... whenever I find time, that is!!
Clearly Vella I am, no??!!! :D :D :D

.................................................................................

a. There is this handwriting analyst(lets call him X) I was hopelessly flirting with and had written him a verse; Aravind (who had nothing to do with this yet believes he can be a part of any conversation in this world) replies... It deserves a post 'coz it's hilarious... here's to you, Aravind!! and yes, I still hate you, Loser Aatma!! :D :D :D

Me:
Tahriir padhke tasveer parakhne wale, bata
kaisa chehra banaate hain musavvir alfaaz mere

Aravind:
Nihaayati badsoorat chehra banaate hai tumhare alfaaz miyaan
inhe dekhkar to aaine me bhi daraar pad jaaye

-----------------------------------------------------------
b. J had to do this amusing job today - where he has to type in a wadever to his database and his database replies to him after 3 hours.... wooowww!!! :P

kishton me guftagu karna hai pesha uska
sabr ka sabaq seekhne ka munaafa milta hai

------------------------------------------------------------
c. I am asked to decide what color I want my walls to be... I, who have a default setting of confusion, clumsiness and craziness!! I will live with whatever, no?! Don't ask me to choose!! No, no, no, no!!

marz utha leta hai jo har dar pe
us mareez se marzi poochna
munaasib nahin, Maula mere

mil jaaye jo bhi manzil pe
manzoor hai mujhe
mubaarak woh manzar
------------------------------------------------------------

154. The Prostitute

Warning: Viewer discretion requested. Some of you may find the content objectionable!! But what the heck, yaar! blog mera hai na!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------
I now am open/ for business;
do you want a ride tonight?
this or that /or this and that-
that you decide tonight!

You old bachelor/ Gere look-alike,
don't you look so forlorn.
Screw all the girls /who turned you down
I'll be your bride tonight!

Johny Darling!/ But haven't you
turned eighteen but today?!
And you already/ want to do something
you've never tried tonight?!

Ha ha!! /My sexy loyalist,
Role play it is again, eh?
Why else would you/ act just so coy
and try to hide tonight?!

You naughty boy/ you naughty boy
you want me to whip your butt?!
Where are my cuffs?Now let us have
you bound and tied tonight!!

You sexy hunk/ in Armani!
Don't, you, just stand and stare!!
Night after night, I've seen you here;
just come inside tonight!!
winks

Oh, you /insatiable monster
what haven't I done with you?
It's almost dawn,/ I hope that you
are satisfied tonight!!

------------------------------------------
How dare you slap me /across my face,
you son of a gun?
Don't treat me like this/ 'coz I'm here
to pawn my pride tonight.

Shut up you bitch/ or I'll smack you again
who do you think you are?
You are a whore/ just stay a whore
and open wide tonight!

153. ... and me!

ok... my mind was just acting up... I realised!! and also that nothing is the end of the world. :) :)

-------------------------------------------------------

This evening I walked out alone. There was just the city and me.
a horde of empty hours lined up. Tear-jerkers and hilarity and me

My heart is dis-oriented. What it proposed, I declined. of course.
all it had on the mind for the evening. some hopeless self-pity and me?!

I found a much better plan which suited my mood and the weather,
the perfect one - my playlist, my dancing shoes lying pretty and me.

Oh my love story. it ended last night again. but well, what's new, I say!
Don't you worry! We are great friends - hope, serendipity and me!!

My sense will fail me again when someone nice meets me this weekend;
Same old story again- silence, vibes, someone sexy and witty and me!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Checked the mirror & found why the last one turned me down in a hurry
Don't we look kinda like reaalllyy similar, that alien thing - ET and me?!
:D :D :D :D

152. My Taj Mahal

I wrote this, aeons ago ; the context, then, was fictitious!
I felt like editing it and reposting it again... so there!!
My mind has called in sick... so you will only get to listen to borrowed and/or old words for a while now, until it reports back!! :) :) :) enjoy nonetheless!!
---------------------------------------------
Why do I write of love?

It is neither pressing
nor impressing
nor depressing

Why do I write of love?

It knows no grammar
It holds no glamour

Then why do I write of
the skies in his eyes on restless days
the storms in my gasps on turbulent nights

Why?

---------------------

I keep moving on
from one story to another
leaving tombs on dead ones
in faceless times
in nameless places
clueless
about the next tombstone.

-----------------------

In the courtyard next to mine,
they are celebrating.

Another love story died today.

Time for yet another Taj Mahal
a tomb
not for a lost lover
but for a love story
dead & dusted.

So tonight
I write of love
I write my last Taj Mahal .

until tomorrow.

-------------------------------------------------

raat yeh bhi guzar jaayegi...

I give in to borrowed words...
for the first time, I post something not mine at all... here...

Gulzar takes over...

ek wo din bhi the
ek ye din bhi hai
ek wo raat thi
ek ye raat hai
raat ye bhi guzar jaayegi

waqt saalon ki dhundh se nikal jaayega
tera chehra nazar se pighal jaayega
aankh band hogi to
neend aa jaayegi

raat ye bhi guzar jaayegi!!

While the mood swings under the tanned sky...

spew venom
sew buttons
rue the night
sue the knight

write rhymes
fight time
bite steaks
white flakes

twiddle fingers
middle fingers
muddle shots
huddle thoughts

watch palindromes
catch fallin' gnomes
patch some torn season
match and scorn reason

I douse my days
and hand-paint desires
they grouse and say
I am but a quaint liar

the sky has been tanning
near the sun forever
should we dye it again
or just set it on fire?
---------------------------------------
I refuse to answer any questions...
by the way, my 150th post ... :D
God save the world!!

I try to wake up
just die to make up
too wry to break up
ask why to take up

and yes of course, my obsession with the sky!!