:)

teraa cheharaa jaise anjuman armaanon ki
tu palke uthaaye to har parda utar jaaye

masroof si rahti hai khud hi se baaton me
muskaan ugaati hai tu jaise jidhar jaaye

maaynon me bandhi baaton se bezaar sawaal kare
yeh kaisa junoon hai tera jisme shaam-o-sehar jaaye

raqeeb ho ya ho sanam, zakhmi hai sukoon tujhse
phir kyun na koi tujhpar ab mukadama kar jaaye

kiston me bharti hai tu ishq nigaahon me
aankhein jo band kare, qaaynaat thahar jaaye

bejaan se lab mere, pal me, khil jaate hai
nooraani yaad teri bas chooke agar jaaye

manzil ki fiqar hai kise? raahon pe pair tere -
pade to raunaq hai, jaise bhi safar jaaye

raqs karna yun shab bhar, rasm apni puraani hai
aasmaan ab surkh hua; chalo ab to ghar jaaye? :P

jo bhi ho phir kal hoga. phir zinda ho jaayenge
chalo aaj ki dasht pe ham baras-ke mar jaaye?

hawaa pe ghazal likh-kar, tere dar pe chodi hai
padh lena ghazal meri, tu chat pe agar jaaye
----------------------------------------------
To Damini, the orange girl! :)

Italicised

She wakes up to a dark room
& makes an attempt to ignore-
all the monsters under her bed,
all the skeletons in the closet,
all the demons in her head;
But nightmares have their way.
She wipes her forehead & whispers
a fervent prayer.
"No, un-italicise me."

She walks on golden brown sand
in a city of frozen glass volcanoes.
Everything is different;
everyone's the same.
She looks at a wisp of white overhead
in a blazing blue sky.
She shades her face & whispers
rather amusedly.
"To un-italicise me?"

She stands on an escalator
& the wrong crowd waves at her.
Colours erupt at a distance
where she is not allowed to go.
She meanders to a mirror;
a muffled reflection flies towards her.
She closes her eyes & whispers
another useless spell.
"Go, un-italicise me"

She stares at a pseudonym-
a name she vowed not to take!
Her fingers drum on her keyboard.
Should she now or should she not?
Her mind is a cluttered warehouse
of stale sense & safe alibis.
She smiles at herself & whispers
to the faceless intruder.
"So, un-italicise me"

Maps are not always
about straight lines.
She had taken a U-turn
before she reached it;
& now she lives a bad dream
stained with credibility.

Let's hope she wakes up someday
with amnesia & an empty past!
If she does , do remind her:
She is better off-
italicised.
------------------------------------------------
:)

Raashan

uski zindagi raashan ki dukaan hai

main har din
ek lambe kataar me khade khade
guzaarti hoon
taaki mujhe bhi uski zindagi ke kuch lamhe
mil jaaye

har roz mujhe gin-ginke
woh do chaar muskaan deta hai
jinhe main seene me bachake rakhti hoon;
har raat tol tolke ek-aadh sapna!


kabhi kabhi saara din
kheechataani me utar jaata hai
aur main saari raat uske dar pe baithi
sooni hatheliyon me neendein senkti rahti hoon
intezaar me;
aur jab meri baari aati hai to pata chalta hai -
stock khatm ho gaya

aaj bhi main uske dar se
khaali haath lauti hoon
bas kuch jale se khaab bache hain,
jo aankhon me dhuaan udaa rahe hain

haan pata hai-
uski zindagi raashan ki dukaan hai
yeh bhi pata hai-
aaj ke saare lamhe black me bik gaye

par suna hai
uske shaam ke kuch tukde aapke paas hain

kya aaj ke liye mujhe aapse aadhi katori yaadein
udhaar mil sakti hain, please?!

Let me do something!

today was another gift
left at my doorstep
wrapped in curious looks & failed gazes as usual

I told you
not to spill silence
between the lines;
Didn't I?
But you!!

Now not a soul knows
what I am all about!

I am the narrator
I am the protagonist
but you-
you are the writer
who wrote me down in his sleep

& here I am
a story without verbs!
Let me do something
before it is too late!!

Khamoshi

zarra zarra ab zaar zaar ho gaya
zara zara si baaton se pyar ho gaya

khamosh lamhon me basi naazuk si zindagi
bas ek baat uthi, aur daraar ho gaya

jo khwaabeedah khwahish jaga gaya tha tu
besukoon kar gaya, main bedaar ho gaya

badgumaan mausam sawaal karte gaye
main bas bezubaan sa beqaraar ho gaya

hazaaron kism ke sannate hain labon pe mere
har lamha khamoshiyon ka dayaar ho gaya

mere dar pe tu aata kabhi to dekhta
muskaanon ka gharonda ab mazhaar ho gaya

besabab jode the tumne tukde chehre par
aur main betalab be-ekhtiyaar ho gaya

bevajah guftagu me shab-o-roz utarte the
ab har shab meri aahon me bezaar ho gaya

faasle ugne me yahaan waqt lagta hai kahaan
ek pal me har darwaaza deewaar ho gaya

cheente kuch raat ke aankhon me rah gaye
dekhkar inhe subah sharm-o-saar ho gaya

hosh ke tukde dhoodhte umr guzri
ab aake khumaar ka shumaar ho gaya

sansani kar gayi, ansuni mar gayi
aaj haqeeqat ka deedar ho gaya?

kitni mayoos hai tu, kitni manhoos hai
zindagi, tumhi se ishq baar baar ho gaya
----------------------------------------------
A Sequel to Guftagu! Return to silence...! :)
Freedom is an awesome feeling!!
But like Phoolan asked me the other time, do I really want to be free?! :D

Have a slice

I snuggle each night under warm sheets
to cold breath & muffled heart beats
The smell of green dreams still lingers on
when I open my eyes to a lazy dawn

& I see-
Too much of nothing is an aphrodisiac
Too little of everything is a sleeping pill

Now when I look back & unsee things-
I know what I need to do & I will

Miles are never a mask
nothing is too much to ask
I have that basket of hope
you gifted me not long ago

I have a slice each dawn for breakfast
If you haven't tried yet, I say you must
There is still quite some left;
want some?

Come over for dinner someday
& I promise when we dine
we will have dreams for dessert
& gulp them down with wine

Deal?!

---------------------------------------
To Hobbesie for being the sweetheart that she is!!
Smilio!! :)

Gap-shap

Jab saanjh saans lene lagti hai
to roshni
chupchaap nikal jaati hai
kuch surkhi phir bhi rah jaati hain aasmaan par

saanjh ke utarte hi
choukhat pe saaye dhera daalke baith jaate hain
gap-shap karne lagte hain
din bhar ki baatein
yahaan-wahaan ke charche

kaise naqshe badalne lage hain
kaise din galne lage hain
kisne daraaron me waqt bharne ki koshish kii
kiske ishq ka tabaadla ho gaya aur kahaan
kaunsi gali me rang hadtaal pe utre hain aur kyun

kuch salaah-mashavare
kuch gile-kachahri

main is shor ki khamosh gawaah banti hoon
har raat

kahin tumhaara naam sa nazar aa jaaye
to main saari raat ek ajnabi dastaan me
kuch harfon ki khwahish liye
rah jaati hoon
in saayon ki bheed me

mere seene me bhi bahut si baatein hain
bekas bekal bezaar besabr
tum kabhi yun-hi gap-shap karne mil jaaya karo na!

mulaqaat

aaj bhi main intezaar karti hoon
jaise pehle karti thi!

haan,
mulaqaatein ab ek arse se khafaa hain
par bahaane to ab bhi ugte rahte hain
aur ummeed bedaar si tahalti rahti hai

mere khayaal
baar baar tumhari baatein duhraate rahte hain
kuch puraani shaamon ki tasveerein liye

tere chehre sa kuch mil jaaye
to uske peeche tere kooche me pahunch jaate hain

kabhi kabhi raahon me
tere kadmon ki aahat-o-nishaan mil jaaye
to unhe dekhne
wahin ruk se jaate hain

aaj kal tum khayaalon me nange paanv kyun aane lage ho?!

benaam khayaal

Har roz kuch kacche khayaal mere yahaan se
lafzon ki talaash me nikalte hain

Har shab yeh khayaal
naakaam se benaam se
laut aate hain

is baar kahin tum inhe mil jaao
to inhe kuch harf pahna dena
kuch lavz thama dena

jaante ho na-
alvida bhi ek lafz hota hai

For want of a better name

You were four syllables before
but now I have a choice
between thirteen syllables & a grunt

& then I think-
what do I call you?

My end sees the night crawl on
for long cold hours
Your window sees the darkness crawl in
at noon

We talk of
wants & winters
over cups of ginger tea

& then I think-
what do I call you?

At dawn,
I fold my sheets
& some funny dreams;
place them under the pillow
for you to laugh them off
when I put them in words

I cry;
you hmmm
I sigh;
you smirk
I bait;
you hunh
I pole vault around;
you groan

While we play pictionary
with our eccentricities,
my room is filled with smiles
that are noticed by all
but you.

& then I think-
What do I call you?

A haiku
A shadow
A trespasser
A vestige of solace
A window of alphabets

I think
I will just leave you unnamed

for want of a better name!!

--------------------------------------------
Bhondu!!
:)

They speak a strange tongue!!!

We did this before & we do it again!!
Arch & me...
After the earlier jugalbandi ,we decide to wreak havoc again with our freaky poetic confluence. So brace yourself for a really incoherent & tangential conversation in verse!!
----------------------------------------------------------------------


Arch: chills sweep me through ,
I drown in smoky boiling waters....
it takes me away to the long loving sleeps ...
I feel touched... I feel loved ...
behind the curtains.. you stare

Sri: hard desperation refuses to go away,
would care to join or jus look the other way?

Arch: to remind me I am still here...
to let you know I will be there...
take a look around and see a fainted face...
right behind the curtains wid orange flowers...
its my purple veil

Sri: this is not the first time,
this has happened before,
but I am tired of stopping,
pls go ahead, gimme more!

Arch: given myself away to you
I stand stranded waiting to be loved...
your hands when they come my way
I feel blessed in bliss....
but then when time flies by
and you stand still
I take a step forward towards my life..
eternal peace

Sri: rhyme is just an excuse,
time is such a recluse,
peace is just another fugitive,
eternity just a sad notion;
Whenever I move, whenever I am still,
I smell of empty space & forever will;
You keep filling me
with memories of yore;
but I am bottomless,
I always yearn for more

Arch: you are like the deep blue see that goes deep inside..
bottomless or shallow within...you decide...
pour out a fine evening..
lets drown in your rains...
your colors will splash up deep into my heart

Sri: Blue I appear, but am not;
all I do is wear the sky;
Worn it for ages, torn pieces of clouds;
it doesn't turn red, it doesn't fade away;
I will sing you a rainy evening,
will you blow the foamy sky away?

Arch: winds I will spray
so I see the rainbow of ur heart..
wipe away those tears
and let the springs come up...
the sun will then shine making you smile...
floating fragrance all around...
dance the happy summer song.. before autumn arives..

Sri: autumn comes & I shed faces
come by & pick them up for me
We will weave a kaleidoscope of smiles,
to look at when you drown the shore
& I reach the stars

Arch: waves will come & take me away...
but love is always here to stay...
we will make a bunch of our smiling times
and share the thorny piercing surprises...
add a few delights...
then when u see a shooting star,
come away with me

Sri: Yes, we will do that,
We will shred the moon
& hide behind the dark night.
While the stars scout for us,
we pull in the sun
& burn them all out!!!

Arch: lets play with the universe
then we dodge a planet or a few...
careful...don't hurt yourself....
the galaxy will burst out seeing us loose

Sri: no! on second thoughts, I would rather,
come by your door & gift you smiles;
I will send you a night full of loving glances,
you write me a dawn of warm hugs!!

Sri: & when the blinds lighten up with your lazy smile,
I will bring you breakfast
with orange juice & fourteen kisses

Arch : aaww sho shweet :P

To Wooden Endings

Another night fell dead on the barb-wire fence
It flew; it fled from a few blades of light
No remorse; no fear
Just pain in vain
Could you do something about the blotting red,
while I sit here tied to the stump of a dead tree??

The sky is hot glass & wishes have wax wings
Some lie beyond; some die within
No end; none mends
They won't stay; they can't go
Could you do something about the dripping wax,
while I sit here tied to the stump of a dead tree??

Words are entangled in smiles & camouflages,
each time they bump into my blue-eyed boy
No chalk; no charcoal
No ink; no lead
Could you do something about the unwritten thoughts,
while I sit here tied to the stump of a dead tree??

& any day you need to furnish
your museum of hearts
Just look up; don't look too far

I sit here tied to the stump of a dead tree!!

Patjhad

kaagazon me aahaton me naam dhoondhti hoon
raat phoonk phoonk-ke main shaam dhoondhti hoon
teri talaash me jam gaye hain saayen sadakon pe
khud raat ban gayi hoon, aaraam dhoondhti hoon

---------------------------------------------------------

sukoon sookha sa rahta hai
jaan simti si rahti hai
tu seene me jabse mere
patjhad sa chod gaya

thaki si roshni ab to
badi der se aati hai
udaas si subah jalti hai
sunn si hatheliyaan jalaati hai

pahron pehle hi ab
aasmaan shaam bulaata hai
saans dhundhli si uthti hai
pyaas chehre banaati hai

tere khayaal kohra bankar
aasmaan pe likhte hain
kab aake gaye kya pata
bas nishaan ab dikhte hain

khushfaham si khidkiyaan kabse
yun khuli sii chodi hain
sabaa sard subahon ki, khaali sii sili sii guzarti hain

aankhein rookhi si hain
aur neend jhadti rahti hai
ukhde se harfon pe
ab barf padti rahi hai

patjhad sa chod gaya
tu seene me jabse mere
awaazein toote se nikalte hain
aur lab chil jaate hain
sukoon sookha sa rahta hai
jaan simti si rahti hai

--------------------------------

kuch naram si muskaan tere
chod jaate hawaaon par
kaanpti raatein un par
senka karti main baithi yahaan

...................................................................................
An ode to a real cold winter whihc has just begun!

Faceless Autumn

I left your place
without my face
there were way too many others
to choose from

The one you gave me in May
The one we made on a lazy afternoon
The one I had, when I called you a 'goon'
The one I found when we talked under the moon
The one I saved to wear in winter
which now I cannot
or the others which tell different stories
to the world

Stories
all of them have the same today
but thousand different
yesterdays & tomorrows
covered with color
filled with gore

I tried to find my face
searching
in wordy labyrinths
which only return echoes

I tried to find my face
prodding
with unending glances
which go unnoticed now

I tried to find my face
looking up,
all those windows
filled with inanities
which felt so good

I tried all monsoon
I tried!!

If you find my face
hidden behind the smile you wrote me
once not long ago
please do not send it across.
It does not go with my wardrobe
anymore!

------------------------------------
Months ago, I had written an ode to a Faceless Intruder.
Now this again, is a note to the same idiot!

Unheard scraps

I come up each day to catch a gaze
I come down each night to have a talk
straining ears to hear muffled footsteps
but there are never any
turn around; make a sound ... will you?

Kill these nights,
identically sinister - all of them,
taunting me & haunting me...!
They don't let me in...
they don't let me go!
Kill them now, will you?

--------------------------------------

Of were-wolves & flying foxes,
eclipses, solstices & equinoxes
of vampires & flying shoes
of treasure hunts & confusing clues

of magic trees & wishing wells
of witches n wizards & confounding spells
of dames & dragons & fearless knights
or of heroes , hippos & sugarless nights

weave me a bedtime story tonight!

---------------------------------------------

A Wintry Romance

I sat on my leaf
my hexagonal glory
twinkling in the crowd
with every passing light

He stood across from me
looking at me through the night
not budging his look
from my face

His eyes were smiling nouns
while they played
noughts & crosses
with mine

He lost all games
but won my heart

& when dawn broke
I fell from above
swimming from shape
to nothingness

He did not look back
He did not look away

I was a snowflake
and
my snowman
had a cold heart;
Obviously!

------------------------------------
Like Utk said, one cannot switch on creativity; I add - neither can one switch off stupidity.
But then, yeah I think I have almost found my switch!! Amen!
Here's to better times.
Thanks Phoolan!! hehe (almost forgot that one, didn't you?!)

Subah

roshni ko khauff hai
mil na jaaye phir kahin
khaab koi raat ka
subah ki aad me
----------------------------------

kya bataaye
kya dekha tha

thode, soone seene ke ghar pade the
thode bujhe se raahon par khade the

ujle ungliyon ki aanch se
mere dar pe saare mar gaye

roshni ko khauff hai
mil na jaaye phir kahin
rang bikhre saanjh ke
subah ki aad me
----------------------------------
kya bataaye
kya dekha tha

parchaiyaan pahanke nikalti dopahre
ummeedein ugalte nigalte woh chehre

neend khuli to dhoop udi
aankhon me andhiyaare bhar gaye

roshni ko khauff hai
mil na jaaye phir kahin
hisse toote neend ke
subah ki aad me
----------------------------------

Har raat ki kahaani

Waise khwahishon ko likhte padhte nahin
par ham hain ki kuch bhi samajhte nahin

--------------------------------------------

badi mehrbaan hoon
shab-e-tajaruba hoon
subah ko saba hoon

Dhoond le ishq meri zameen par

yahaan hoon wahaan hoon
hawaa hoon dhuaan hoon
har kiski duaa hoon

Chod de ishq meri zameen par

jaan baqsh doon, jee vaar doon
jaan kaat-ke sau baar doon

har saans ko parwaaz de doon?

kal khaali aasmaan bhar dengi
khwahishein

---------------------------------------------------

ud lo zara to peeche peeche mausam bhi aayenge
saayon se jhadkar kheenche se ham bhi aayenge

ek umr kya; hazaar doon
seene ki shikan sawaar doon

har saans ko parwaaz de doon?

kal khaali aasmaan bhar dengi
khwahishein

-----------------------------------------------

peshani pe ab raat rakh le, aankhon ke faasle bhar jaaye
labon ki har baat chakh le, khamoshiyaan dabke mar jaaye

nigaahon se sukoon udhaar doon
in aankhon se junoon utaar doon

har saans ko parwaaz de doon?

kal khaali aasmaan bhar dengi
khwahishein

------------------------------------------------

kal subah
ek chehra hoga, ek naam hoga
kahin thahra hua koi kaam hoga

kahaani hogi par baat nahin hogi
peshani pe thami si raat nahin hogi

par jab raat hogi
phir saansein udengi

aur khaali aasmaan bhar dengi
khwahishein

On My Own

I changed houses
I moved into a dream
with an angel
who wore
my favourite part of the day
all the time
Was it a cloud?
was it a shroud?

I went blind
the windows were all nailed
the hinges were all rusted
but deaf-mute caresses
do not leave
space to breathe
the drying dew
was there a cue?

I open my window today
to autumn leaves & noisy winds
to alien smells & hideous sights
I am scared
but I think I will find my way
I think I will make
my own favourite part of the day

---------------------------------

I found a map
& took the right turn
that wasn't there
but then, my angel,
he did not tell me
he would head straight
Should I hit a brake?
Was it a big mistake?

I see a street
the pavement
a crowd of broken stories
I reach out
for that hand
which is around no more
Am I free?
Should I flee?

I unhook my shadow today
I have been in the dark long enough
I can leap ahead blind-folded, unarmed
I am scared
but I think I will find my way
I think I will make
my own favourite part of the day

The Call

I waited, punching on the remote
staring at the screen
the flickering images making me no sense

I waited, flipping through the magazine
staring unseeingly at the same page
again & again

I waited, brushing my hair
every other few minutes

I just did not want to fall asleep

I made myself a cup of tea
strange, it took longer than it usually does
but shorter than I wanted it to take

I waited last night
I waited till late into the night
I waited till it was night no more

I waited for the call which never came
& now it is night again.

But I am sure -you will call tonight!!